Today was a calm, nice day. Had lunch with my Uncle Guillermo and Aunt Marcela and my grandma. We went shopping for a minute and then they showed me their apartment. Which is probably where Ill stay for a little while after my mom leaves next Monday. I know I need the time and space to heal in complete quiet and tranquility. We'll see how I feel by Monday.
I've been doing awesome with my food. I set my mind to knowing things were going to start drastically changing and instantly I have been eating super small meals and filling up pretty quick. So its been good. I've been managing it well. Plus I have to drink this protein drink and its delicous!! Today(the 20th) is Camilo's Bday so we went out to a movie..Yes again..thats the best part with him. We love love the movies. I think I can stay at a movie theatre all day.
I forgot to mention the other night that I had seen a cousin that I havent seen in many years. A year ago he had the same surgery I'm about to have and he failed. Its so easy for the Drs. to show you all the great successful cases. But I felt blessed to see one that had failed. We talked for a while about it, and I was very direct with him about why he had failed. He never thought he had to take care of himself. That it would just happen like magic. The amount of food that he served himself made me uncomfortable. It was as if it was the last time he was ever going to eat. Or that his food was going to be stolen from him. It kinda broke my heart. At first he was hesitant and wouldn't admit it. He just said the surgery didn't work. By the end, he admitted that he simply hadnt done the required work. Felt bad, but at the same time no pity on someone who doesnt want to put the effort into it. So I was grateful to go into this with such a different mind set. Understanding and knowing the terms of this contract. LOL You have to change your lifestyle. If you dont, you've wasted your time, your money and all your efforts. I gaurantee, none of this will be a loss. All a gain. I'm so excited, theres no words really.
Tomorrow(today LOL) is a big day. Lots to get done before I am cleared for surgery. Gonna remember to stay calm, focused and stress free. Surgery is scheduled for 10am on Tuesday. So if you remember, say a little prayer for me. Or whatever it is you do when you want the best for someone you care about. Good vibes, positive energy. Call it whatever you like, I would appreciate it deeply.
Thank you for reading
I am sorry Ana that I am delayed on reading and PRAYING for you. However, I pray at this very moment that God will carry these beautiful, positive reflections over into your life after your surgery. I pray that all these amazing levels of realization and enlightenment will follow you EVERYWHERE you go. It's one thing to get away from it all, the daily grind, and search deep... it's another to bring what you found back with you and continue living with that knowledge. Let this experience shape, change and mold you. Let it never leave you. May you wake up each morning with a reminder of all this that you've went through... all the work... all the tears... all the stress... and let it keep you thankful, understanding, appreciative and willing.
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